Back on the Water-A Familiar View

Yesterday was a hot summer day around here. I know, "hot" is relative, of course, but hot for this island is about 80 degrees. Hot enough for a lake day. Our friends have been working on their boat with the goal of getting it out on the lake this summer. Sunday was the day. We made a plan to meet at one of our friend's lake property...

And then the panic started. I was realizing it had been B.C. (before cancer) that we were at the lake. I started to rehash all sorts of "stuff". I wept. I don't understand how it comes in waves like that, the grief. I knew in my head that we would probably have fun, but you know those "firsts" are scary when they come. The first holiday without him, the first birthday without him, the first anniversary without him, the first everything. This Sunday was the first time being on the water -- without him. My insides were seizing up.

The kids recognized it too. In fact they commented on the drive over that they hardly remember the lake since they were so small when we lived there. Two summers prior to moving from the lake we had borrowed a boat and had such a blast. Well, yesterday was no exception. It did turn out wonderfully. Cole even said, "Mom I had the greatest time today! All I can remember from when we were little at the lake was Keaton wanting me to go in deeper than I really wanted to." I did not get in the water myself (this Northwest water is not nearly warm enough for me...) but the guys did. And they had fantastic time with friends.

And my fears of an emotional meltdown all dissipated as an interesting scenario unfolded. We started out, just a few of us in the boat taking a little cruise, headed to where we used to live on the other side of the lake. I lot of stuff was going on in my head. I was glad to be on the water. And I thought it would be cathartic, just rip off the band-aid, see the old house and move on with my life. Now this boat is an old boat and has been in storage for 15 years. But it has received some major TLC and maintenance in the last few weeks and our friends had already taken a spin around the lake before we arrived. But when I was in the boat, and we were almost to within sight of our old house and the engine sputtered and gave out. We called our friend for a tow. And then kind of drifted in the middle of the lake. We tried the engine again and it turned over, so we began heading back to the dock where we'd come from. Due to this unfortunate series of events, I never even had to see where we used to live. Sparing me more heartache. I count it a small blessing.

Okay, so maybe I'm over-dramatizing it a little. But I really did feel like it was a miracle that I didn't have to feel that rush of memories. When I was talking to my brother about the stress and anxiety all of this produced in me, he reminded me this is just life. I was feeling overwhelmed emotionally (our cat is pregnant, our flooring is halfway done, Keaton's starting driver's ed, school starts in a month, CPA review is going to take 400 more hours, blah, blah, blah) and he just calmly talked me off the ledge. Life is hard sometimes. But it just is what it is. We just have to keep walking it out. 

Turned out to be a great day at the lake! Because we had called our friend for help, he and his wife came down to their property and spent the afternoon with us. One of their sons came over (who also works with me) and his roommate (who used to live around the corner from us) and zipped around on a jet-ski. Four of their other children also hung out with us. Another guy from work drifted by in his boat with his family. And we were able to borrow our friend's boat and pull the boys all around the lake on a fancy inner-tube. We had a picnic and relaxed and chatted and I was glad to make it through another first.

Psalm 136:1 Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever.

Thanksgiving Gathering

Desserts

This year our Love Your Neighbor team hosted a group of 50+ at our church for a Thanksgiving Potluck.  We had so many helping hands, mountains of food, and sweet fellowship all around.

The idea was birthed on our flight down to San Diego (heading to Mexico) - - without fail, when we are home for holiday celebrations, we are graciously invited to someone's home.  And while that is always fun and we are super grateful for friends that we can spend time with, I got to wondering about others who do NOT have people inviting them in.  My friend Malinda and I began to dream of inviting shut-ins and military families and single people that might come to a gathering if we had a bigger location.  So I just asked our church if we could use the facility.  Voila! Our 1st annual LYN Thanksgiving Dinner actually happened!!  There was already talk of doing the same thing again next year.

table decor courtesy of the Gates family & many helpers

We had 4 turkeys, one ham and a bounty of sides.  I roasted a turkey - probably the 3rd one I've EVER made. (Tip from my stepmom, Sharon Cook-- use a poultry bag.  It's a clear plastic sack that the turkey cooks in and it keeps everything amazingly moist!) I also made some "Pink Stuff", my Texas grandmother's recipe, which some of these Northwestern friends have come to love.

This event could not have happened without the team of really hard workers from our teens up through the older crowd.  I was so blessed to share this Thanksgiving with friends and "family"...the family of Christ.  Can't wait for next year!

Psalm 136:1 "Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good.  His love endures forever."

Off to the Races

Last weekend our friends scored free tickets to the local speedway.  The boys had experienced this before, but I'd never been.... That night the racers and team sponsors gave away over 200 bikes to kids under 12.  A very generous group of folks.  And one other thing's for sure, it is loud!  Fortunately our friends also thought to bring extra earplugs. (THANK YOU!)  Before the real races started, we sang the American and  Canadian National anthems AND prayed.  Pretty cool.

Video of one sprint cart race:

 

It's not Indy (click here for photos of our 2018 Indianapolis trip), but it was still a blast.  And really, what's a good race without a wreck?  (Sorry to say, but I really think the possibility of a crash is what keeps my dad awake during NASCAR on Sunday afternoons....)  We did see a car flip completely over, 360 degrees, and one lost a tire.  Caution flags were out with frequency.

Here's a video after one such event:

The driver walked away from this one.

August 31st marks the end of our lazy days.  School starts up next week.  Gotta say, it's been a joyous summer! Just to recap:

• Indoor Skydiving
• Many Miles of Hikes
• Puppy Surprise
• Cole is a Teen
• Mom @ She Speaks
• Canadian water slides
• Sprint Car races

Psalm 118:1-2 "Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever."

Canadian Summer

This weekend we made a quick trip north with our frequent travelling companions - The Evans Family.  The destination?  Waterpark!  It was our friend Ethan's 16th birthday.  So there was lots of celebrating.  We had a ton of fun.  Was nice to get away for a couple of days and not think about the responsibilities of work or school (for me).

After dinner out, we went to a spot with underground mini golf, go-carts, and an arcade. They also had batting cages and a shooting gallery, and a whole upstairs area we didn't even have time to explore.  After a bit of trouble with our credit cards (Chase cards were not working internationally at this specific location) we got it all worked out and each played a round of golf. Boys did go-carts and a couple of arcade games, including a laser maze (see video below).

 

Felt kind of like a repeat of Florida last year.  The 4 boys made up a team and the girls plus Derek made up another team.  A lot of fun!

 

Video of Cole in the laser maze below:

 This park is bigger than Birch Bay.  Several more slides and a bigger spot for shallow swimmers (a.k.a. little kids area).  AND, there is a short lazy river...which is the only ride I personally went on.  Everyone else, including little Emily went on slides.  I think everyone had a fantastic time.  Worth the 2.5 hr drive.  Hardly any traffic.  Set in the hills of the Fraser Valley.  Just beautiful.  It was roughly 75 degrees (or 24 C, because it is Canada, after all).

Boys stop for a food break

Today it was back to reality.  I woke up with a sore throat and coughing.  Stayed in bed most of the day.  Keaton and some of the Evans' clan are nursing sunburns too. We had our first overnight without the puppy - - a friend stayed with her and he said she did great!  I think being able to sleep on the bed is a bonus for her....

Military Aircraft

One Saturday last month we toured a local air museum.  There was actually a fly-in with some pretty cool military aircraft flown by a well-known pilot family.  One of the guys was once an Apollo 8 astronaut - - William Anders - - and he founded the museum. They flew in a missing man formation (see video below).  It was really exciting being that close.  Even though this field trip was technically last month, I thought it was appropriate to post pictures on this July 4th, as these aircraft (and the ones flying around our skies locally day in and day out) represent the freedoms that our country has enjoyed for a couple of centuries.  Though I love planes, the makes and models are not something I have committed to memory.  This would have been a cool thing to bring my ex-Air Force father to.  He would have been able to identify most, if not all of the aircraft.  Nevertheless, I am thankful for those military families who protect us and fight for freedom around the world.

 

(Video below)

Another aspect of this museum day was a talk presented by a female aviator that fought in Iraq/Afghanistan and currently lives in our area.  She was very inspirational.  Letting the young ladies in the audience, as well as the young men, know that with hard work you can achieve much.  But even she realizes there are times when working hard is not enough.  She did not mention God, but she did confess that when a comrade she was supposed to be protecting died (her unit would assist when combat units got in trouble and needed extraction) she felt helpless.  She would say a little prayer and apologize to them, while standing at attention during their funeral procession on base, saying she was so sorry she could not keep them safe.

What I know is that I am NOT in control of much.  And I'm finally okay with that.  There are scary things in this life.  Financial crises.  Death of a child or a spouse.  Divorce.  Even public speaking.  But we serve a God who loves us perfectly and casts out all fear.  In accepting the Salvation He offers, we are free!  I feel such glee that I can drop those chains and be free of all fear.

Revelation 21:4-5 "And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away. And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful." 

Before May is Gone

This last week I heard a song that I wanted to share:

"Scars" by I am They



The chorus says - -

"So I'm thankful for the scars.  'Cause without them I wouldn't know your heart.  And I know they'll always tell of who you were.  So forever I am thankful for the scars."

The 2nd verse says - -

"Now I'm standing in confidence.  With the strength of your faithfulness.  And I'm not who I was before. No I don't have to fear anymore."

Okay, so after the week I've had, I wish I could say that I'm done with grief of losing my spouse.  After this many years, it's still very vivd, the loss.  I'm not sure it will ever fade to black.  But I'm SOOOO sure that God has made something good from the scars.  In me.  In my children.  In my friends. 

The bridge - -

"I can see.  I can see.  How you've delivered me. In your hands, in your feet, I've found my victory...."

Last night we had a worship "jam" night with the team.  Never experienced this type of gathering before.  And, to think of who I once was in this area of my life...it's just pretty amazing how God has brought me forward.  I haven't played violin with a group in many, many years, but last night I got it out and played.  Freely.  With group of people who have truly become my friends over the last several years.  The One whom we worship, knits our talents together splendidly for His glory.

 

 

A side note to this - - I asked Cole if I could borrow his iPad for the worship last night (there's an app with all the worship music on it) but he was rather reluctant.  So he offered me a deal.  I could use the iPad if I would promise to play Monopoly with him today.  Okay, I agreed.


6am today, he was in my bed with Monopoly.  As is often the case at that hour, I was reading my devotional and worshiping before the start of my day.  He was eager to play the game, of course, but he said, "Oh! You're doing your devotions.  I can respect that."


7am we were at the kitchen table playing Monopoly.  Listening to and watching a couple of eagles soaring around the neighborhood.  (Literally.)  The game was a challenging back and forth.  He was up.  Then I was.  He had Boardwalk & Park Place, but I ended up winning....after a 2.5 hr match up!  So good to spend time with him, just me and Cole, doing something he loves to do.

I am thankful for the scars, as I know it's brought me to the realization that my people are a gift from the Lord.  I should cherish the time spent with them.  And that even the cares of school, and work, and groceries, and house payments...none of that even matters in an eternal perspective.  The God of the Universe cares for me.  He has power over the waves of the ocean.  He knows what is best and has a brilliant plan of how to get me there.

Matthew 8:27 "And the men marveled saying, 'What sort of man is this, that even the winds and sea obey him?'"